Lake Country Publications Sports Director JR Radcliffe provides tidbits and details on the Lake Country prep sports scene, from live gameday blogs and exclusive interviews to commentaries and observations.
That's my reaction when I attend a high-school sporting event and hear a parent badmouth the home-team coach. I see a person who can't separate his or her child's success from their own, and someone with zero perspective.
Maybe that’s not entirely fair. I work with coaches pretty regularly, so my bias will admittedly lead me to side with the coach over the parent. I'm not yet a parent myself, and I've never known what it's like to watch my child put so much effort into something. I can’t empathize with those who openly criticize a coach and complain about a child’s playing time or role on the team.
Earlier this week, two-time state player of the year Jeronne Maymon quit the Marquette men’s basketball team, and many shocked Marquette supporters were quick to point the figure in a number of directions. Fans of state boys hoops know the name Tim Maymon well, since Jeronne’s father has been a very present figure in the recruitment process and his son’s career. Too present, people like myself would say.
I thought Marquette coach Buzz Williams handled Maymon’s departure with grace. Take this line, which really stood out to me…
“I want all of the sons of the parents on our team to be great, and I think that J-May was progressing that way. … I hate that it didn't work out for a longer period of time, but I understand their dissatisfaction. But our team is never going to be about one son; it's always going to be about all the sons."
Amen.
I recently attended a high school sporting event and witnessed a parent all-out accost the coach after the game. Surrounded by other students, other parents and fans filtering out of the building, the parent began with an accusatory tone and escalated from there. The parent felt their child was the victim of a "personal vendetta" by the coach, which is truly hard for me to wrap my head around.
Personal vendetta! It’s like an episode of The Sopranos. (Can you imagine being Anthony Jr's football coach? That would add a whole new level to the parent problem).
Even if I’m unqualified to say so, I just wish people could ask themselves, “does what I’m thinking/saying make sense” or, more importantly, “Is this the right time and venue to address it?” I’ve learned if there is something I truly want to address, the best way is to do so calmly, eloquently and long after my initial frustration has passed. Furthermore, is it just impossible for parents to assume the best way to overcome a dissatisfying situation is more work, more patience and more resolve?
"When you're a parent, you want your best for the kids, and it’s the hardest thing in the world to look at and watch it," one athletic director said. "You would hope common sense would prevail and that would be the end of it. I understand the emotions behind it; I don’t understand the level of emotion. If not athletics, it might be the theater or at a job. The hardest thing to do as a parent is watch your kid fail or not get the opportunity."
The AD I spoke to said he deals with at least two unhappy parents a week, and he has even been accosted physically on more than one occasion in the past. That really made my jaw hit the floor. I don’t want to devolve into the basic “It’s just a game” rhetoric, because I do realize to high school kids, it’s a very important part of their lives and will be for a long time. But getting borderline violent about it seems astoundingly over the top.
I was talking with a colleague about his young elementary-aged daughter, who is pretty undersized on her basketball team and didn't even take a shot in a game last year. He expressed how awesome it was to see her make her first "career" basket this week and the jubilation that washed over her face. I wish parents of high school and college kids could think back to moments like that one, when the simplest things and just the joy of competing was enough to make both the parent and the kid smile.
I don’t think this problem is particularly new – maybe more intense in recent years, but teams have always had one or two parents who take things too far. But it's a problem, all the same. Just keep repeating Buzz's words to yourself. It’s never going to be about one son. It’s always going to be about all the sons.
Pictured: Former state star Jeronne Maymon left the Marquette program this week.
Oh, you're one of those people.
That's my reaction when I attend a high-school sporting event and hear a parent badmouth his or her kid’s coach. I see a person who can't distinguish their child's success from their own, and someone with zero perspective.
Maybe that’s not entirely fair. I work with coaches pretty regularly, so my bias will admittedly lead me to side with the coach over the parent. I'm not yet a parent myself, and I've never known what it's like to watch my child put so much effort into something. I can’t empathize with those who openly criticize a coach and complain about a child’s playing time or role on the team.
Earlier this week, two-time state player of the year Jeronne Maymon quit the Marquette men’s basketball team, and many shocked Marquette supporters were quick to point the figure in a number of directions. Fans of state boys hoops know the name Tim Maymon well, since Jeronne’s father has been a very present figure in the recruitment process and his son’s career. Too present, people like myself would say.
Marquette coach Buzz Williams handled Maymon’s departure with grace. Take this line, which really stood out:
“I want all of the sons of the parents on our team to be great, and I think that J-May was progressing that way. … I hate that it didn't work out for a longer period of time, but I understand their dissatisfaction. But our team is never going to be about one son; it's always going to be about all the sons”
Amen.
I recently attended a high school sporting event and witnessed a parent all-out accost the coach after the game. Surrounded by other students, other parents and fans filtering out of the building, the parent began with an accusatory tone and escalated from there. The parent felt their child was the victim of a “personal vendetta” by the coach, which is truly hard for me to wrap my head around.
Personal vendetta! It’s like an episode of The Sopranos. (Can you imagine being Anthony Jr's football coach? That would add a whole new level to the parent problem)
Even if I’m unqualified to say so, I just wish people could ask themselves, ‘Does what I’m thinking/saying make sense,’ or more importantly, ‘Is this the right time and venue to address it?’ I’ve learned if there is a grievance I truly want to address, the best way is to do so calmly, eloquently and long after my initial frustration has passed. Furthermore, is it just impossible for parents to assume the best way to overcome a dissatisfying situation is more work, more patience and more resolve?
“When you're a parent, you want your best for the kids, and it’s the hardest thing in the world to look at and watch it,” one athletic director said. “You would hope common sense would prevail and that would be the end of it. I understand the emotions behind it; I don’t understand the level of emotion. If not athletics, it might be the theater or at a job. The hardest thing to do as a parent is watch your kid fail or not get the opportunity.”
The AD I spoke to said he deals with at least two unhappy parents a week, and he has even been accosted physically on more than one occasion in the past. That really made my jaw hit the floor. I don’t want to devolve into the basic “It’s just a game” rhetoric, because to high school kids, it’s a very important part of their lives and will be for a long time. But getting borderline violent about it seems astoundingly over the top.
I was talking with a colleague about his young elementary-aged daughter, who is pretty undersized on her basketball team and didn't even take a shot in a game last year. He expressed how awesome it was to see her make her first “career” basket this week and the jubilation washed over her face. I wish parents of high school and college kids could think back to moments like that one, when the simplest things and just the joy of competing was enough to make both the parent and the kid smile.
I don’t think this problem is particularly new – maybe more intense in recent years, but teams have always had one or two parents who take things too far. But it's a problem, all the same. Just keep repeating Buzz's words to yourself. It’s never going to be about one son. It’s always going to be about all the sons.
Pictured: Jeronne Maymon, who left Marquette's basketball team this week.
That's my reaction when I attend a high-school sporting event and hear a parent badmouth the home-team coach. I see a person who can't separate his or her child's success from their own, and someone with zero perspective.
Maybe that’s not entirely fair. I work with coaches pretty regularly, so my bias will admittedly lead me to side with the coach over the parent. I'm not yet a parent myself, and I've never known what it's like to watch my child put so much effort into something. I can’t empathize with those who openly criticize a coach and complain about a child’s playing time or role on the team.
Earlier this week, two-time state player of the year Jeronne Maymon quit the Marquette men’s basketball team, and many shocked Marquette supporters were quick to point the figure in a number of directions. Fans of state boys hoops know the name Tim Maymon well, since Jeronne’s father has been a very present figure in the recruitment process and his son’s career. Too present, people like myself would say.
I thought Marquette coach Buzz Williams handled Maymon’s departure with grace. Take this line, which really stood out to me…
“I want all of the sons of the parents on our team to be great, and I think that J-May was progressing that way. … I hate that it didn't work out for a longer period of time, but I understand their dissatisfaction. But our team is never going to be about one son; it's always going to be about all the sons."
Amen.
I recently attended a high school sporting event and witnessed a parent all-out accost the coach after the game. Surrounded by other students, other parents and fans filtering out of the building, the parent began with an accusatory tone and escalated from there. The parent felt their child was the victim of a "personal vendetta" by the coach, which is truly hard for me to wrap my head around.
Personal vendetta! It’s like an episode of The Sopranos. (Can you imagine being Anthony Jr's football coach? That would add a whole new level to the parent problem).
Even if I’m unqualified to say so, I just wish people could ask themselves, “does what I’m thinking/saying make sense” or, more importantly, “Is this the right time and venue to address it?” I’ve learned if there is something I truly want to address, the best way is to do so calmly, eloquently and long after my initial frustration has passed. Furthermore, is it just impossible for parents to assume the best way to overcome a dissatisfying situation is more work, more patience and more resolve?
"When you're a parent, you want your best for the kids, and it’s the hardest thing in the world to look at and watch it," one athletic director said. "You would hope common sense would prevail and that would be the end of it. I understand the emotions behind it; I don’t understand the level of emotion. If not athletics, it might be the theater or at a job. The hardest thing to do as a parent is watch your kid fail or not get the opportunity."
The AD I spoke to said he deals with at least two unhappy parents a week, and he has even been accosted physically on more than one occasion in the past. That really made my jaw hit the floor. I don’t want to devolve into the basic “It’s just a game” rhetoric, because I do realize to high school kids, it’s a very important part of their lives and will be for a long time. But getting borderline violent about it seems astoundingly over the top.
I was talking with a colleague about his young elementary-aged daughter, who is pretty undersized on her basketball team and didn't even take a shot in a game last year. He expressed how awesome it was to see her make her first "career" basket this week and the jubilation that washed over her face. I wish parents of high school and college kids could think back to moments like that one, when the simplest things and just the joy of competing was enough to make both the parent and the kid smile.
I don’t think this problem is particularly new – maybe more intense in recent years, but teams have always had one or two parents who take things too far. But it's a problem, all the same. Just keep repeating Buzz's words to yourself. It’s never going to be about one son. It’s always going to be about all the sons.
Pictured: Former state star Jeronne Maymon left the Marquette program this week.
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